The art of commitment

I think I've learned something about myself. I have a hard time making a commitment. It hit me when I watched myself avoid signing a new lease for my apartment.

I used to not be this way. While I was never foolish, I'd jump into just about anything without hesitation. Jobs, relationships, apartment leases. Since then, I've learned commitments are much more difficult to get out of than into.

I've been on my own for a year now. Signing the original lease was easy. It meant freedom. At the time, I knew I wouldn't be itching to move in the first year. I love the area where I live as well as my apartment, but signing another lease that commits me to twelve more months was a tough move. Freedom a year ago meant I was free from my old life and bad marriage. Now freedom has a new meaning. It means I can go and do and live and be wherever I want . . . in a year, that is.

I'm not sure this fear of commitment is a good thing.

Based on my recent dating experiences, I'm also not committing to any kind of relationship. Since I've been single, I've met and been out with lots of guys. I'm never bored. They're all different kinds of men of varying ages, careers, interests and stages in life. Some have been fun and some - well - I always learn something from them.

In this case I'm certain the fear of commitment is indeed a good thing. And I'm sure my friends would agree.

I don't knock commitment. People need it in romantic relationships especially. A couple can't survive without it. For me, freedom is the most fabulous and liberating feeling, and I know it's where I need to be.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

P.S. I did sign my new lease, so I'm here for another year, at least.