Once and done

I had an interesting conversation via text today. We were firming up dinner plans for tomorrow. During the exchange, I asked him how his week was so far.

"Week is ok," he texted back. "Had a date last night, other than that normal."

I had to respond. "So your date wasn't normal?"

"It was good," he said. "I took her home this morning, but I think it's just another once and done. Kinda getting tired of those."

That life keeps a single person busy but lonely. So why do people do it? Is it for companionship? Something to do? It was a Tuesday, so I wonder if either of them considered it an "A" date.

He's a good guy from what I can tell. He has a job and an income. He lives alone, drives a nice car and seems responsible. But he's another one who was burned by his last girlfriend. She cheated on him and he gave her the boot. After living in their old apartment alone, he just moved down a few floors to his own.

As an interesting side note, she's the second girl recently who split with guys I know. The bizarre part is that both guys weren't around when the girls moved out - and both girls took the bed. Both guys said the beds were theirs. As someone who was in that situation almost a year ago, our bed was the last thing I wanted to take with me. I wanted a new one - with with new bed karma and none of him.

My gut tells me people keep doing these "once and done" dates because they seem safe. They're short, sometimes very sweet and no one wants anything in return. And they don't have to lay their heart out there. They don't have to be vulnerable. Most jilted single people don't want to make a commitment beyond which side of the bed they'll sleep on. I'm not sure many of us can think that far into the future this soon after a big breakup.

And another commitment may mean another hurt. And no one wants another broken heart.

Love to the single girls,
Addison