Fear and strip clubs

Last night my friend and I were in a conversation with the bartender while sipping wine. I'm not sure how the topic of strip clubs came up, but he was telling us about taking his brother-in-law to one. My friend said her boyfriend would never dare go. She would never let him. Our bartender friend said he would never dare go to one either.

"My wife would kill me," he said. The strip club outing was was a favor to his wife because his brother-in-law he has muscular dystrophy and never had the opportunity to do things like that.

The conversation made me think. None of my partners have ever had that kind of fear of me. Maybe that's part of the problem. I'm too nice; too accepting of who they are. A little of that is good to avoid becoming naggy.

But should there be fear between partners in a relationship? I'm not sure it's actually fear but rather deep respect. Respect for the relationship, their partner's beliefs and values as an individual. Maybe there's a little fear of losing their friend, partner and lover. That hint of fear is healthy.

Not everyone builds this kind of respect and that glimmer of fear within their relationship. I believe some people aren't capable. I hope my next relationship has it though.

We can't change someone, but we can walk away.

Love to the single girls,
Addison