Different kind of escapes

It's interesting to me what different people do when they're stressed.

I've always turned to people I trust  to help me through the tough times. When things are really tough, I tend to go it alone. I retreat until I sort things out - or at least decide what to do to fix it. That way, I know it's my decision and no one else has influenced it.

While I was married, one of the first red flags that the relationship was going south was that I didn't turn to my husband for comfort or advice when I was stressed. I didn't trust him. And on top of that, his idea of advice and comfort sucked. He thought fucking would solve everything. Trust me, it didn't. 

When my friends are stressed, I try to be there for them to listen or talk about it or not talk about it or sit with them or leave them alone. Most of my friends tell me I'm calming. All I typically do is listen. A caring ear and a hug usually helps more than sharing words of wisdom.

I'm spending a little time over the next few days with someone I consider a good friend. He's also an amazing lover. He's been there for me when things were bad. He's helped me be regain the strength and confidence that got buried so deep during my bad marriage. 

Now he's going through tough times. He's on the path to improve his life but things don't always go as planned. I know I can't fix things but I care and want to be there for him. That's what friends do. That's not his style though. He retreats. He slips back into an introverted comfort zone. Alone.

When we saw each other last night we picked up where we left off. He doesn't want to burden me with his problems. So I let him know I'm always there for him. Perhaps being together is his escape.

That's what friends do.

Love to the single girls,

Addison