Take a walk on the wild side

After dinner the other night in Charleston, there was a smoke shop next door to the restaurant (High Cotton was the restaurant and I recommend it).

I had to go in. They might have clove cigarettes.

And they did.

My friends waited outside while I shopped. And they wondered what I was up to.

Now keep in mind that I don't smoke. Really. Except for the last time I took a little walk on the wild side a couple of months ago. You can read about that evening in Clove cigarettes, rainbows and fucking rainbows.

This shop was out of the regular cloves, but who needs regular? I bought a pack of vanilla.

I've looked at it and smelled it for a week now. And they're mine. Not bummed off of someone else. So they count this time.

Someday soon I'll take a walk on the wild side again and smoke one. Or maybe two. When the mood strikes.

Take a walk on the wild side this weekend. You deserve some crazy fun. I know I am.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

Birthday bashes!

Last night I took part in a friend's birthday party. It was all about karaoke, and the group sure had fun doing it.

This group in my apartment community is the best at celebrating birthdays. Not one escapes without notice. Dinner and a party at a local bar are the usual celebrations.

At these parties, shots are more prevalent than birthday cakes. The birthday girl last night actually had a candle stuck in a piece of a fried steak finger that had been doused in brown gravy. Her boyfriend fed it to her -- and it was on Facebook by this morning. Then the shots started. It's a creative bunch.

And last night's was the second karaoke party this week and the third party since Sunday. This has been the season for birthdays, and I'm starting to see a few dark circles under the eyes of the folks who have gone all of them.

Did I do karaoke you might ask? No. Karaoke is like sunbathing topless at the beach. I only do it around people I don't know. Considering the topics, I don't want to call myself shy, but I'd rather not let it all hang out in front of everyone I know.

I haven't had a birthday yet since I've lived here, and I know one way I want to celebrate it. Sober. Or mostly sober, at least.

Exactly how, where and with whom is still undecided, but I know it will be good. So let me know if you have good birthday party ideas. This single girl doesn't like to be outdone.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

Financial Friday

Last night I ran into a couple I know while taking my friend's dog for a walk. He and his girlfriend had just had a drink at the Italian place across the street from me and he said something shocking.

"We were going to have dinner there but we just ordered a pizza instead," he said.

Oh, okay. Pizza's good on a Thursday night.

Then he said more. "I added up on my credit card statements that I spent $11 grand the last couple of months on going out."

What? Yes, that's $11,000 on alcohol and food over a couple of months for he and his girlfriend. And they're not big on fancy places. This is mainly booze. Crown, beer and Jägermeister with a few meals thrown in. I'm guessing he doesn't pay for his weed on the credit card, so that's on top. Eleven grand would buy a car or several nice trips. It would even pay a big part of a house down payment.

The timing was interesting. I had just watched a Socialcam friend's video about how she and her family are just on the verge of being debt free. She was floating. Ecstatic. And they had made sacrifices getting there. Done without luxuries, extras and even TV. Based on what I saw, she thought it was so worth it, and she taught her kids a good lesson in the process.

Even though I've never met her, she inspires me.

Part of the freedom of being a single girl is being debt free. When you're single, there's no one to turn to when you can't make ends meet. Besides, I never want to to depend on anyone for anything I can do for myself. And who wants to be the poor girl who can never afford any fun?

Don't get me wrong. I love my nice things. Nice trips. Cool clothes. Fast car. Shoes. And I've probably spent more money on clothes and going out since I've been single. But I work my ass off.

And I pay for it all right then (after I get the miles on my credit card, that is). I also clip coupons, shop sales and do half-price sushi night when I can. And I don't drink up $100 bar tabs. Why bother when you can't remember doing it?  

And the best part, with a little money, you can be in control. And that's the kind of single girl I want to be.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

I'm no kid anymore

And I paid my dues while I was a kid. So if anyone scolds me or tells me what to do, it's not going to work. It never has. And it never will. Just ask my mother and my ex.

My mother's given up. She used to boss me around, tell me what to do and how to do it. All the time. Now I just say okay and do whatever I want.

My ex never quit trying to control me. It was over the top. A real problem. Even though his life was a mess, for some reason he thought his ideas, his approaches were so much better than mine. And he was convinced I was stupid to not do what he said. Yeah right. If I had, I'd still be married to him. That would be stupid.

How did I ever wake up in the morning and get through the day without help? How did I make decisions and survive living on this earth all the years without someone there telling me what to do at every move?

Family, friends, clients and boyfriends. Any time someone tells me what to do, they can be almost sure I won't do it. Not then. Not ever.

Even Siri tells you what to do. You know what I'm talking about if you have an iPhone. Over the weekend, Siri kept coming up uninvited.

"Go to hell, Siri," I said.

"Goodbye would have been more polite," Siri said.

Really?

Okay, I confess. Sometimes it's the delivery rather than the idea. I'm not totally stubborn. But, if I'm going to be scolded, told what to do, or anything else remotely controlling, this is the reaction you'll get.

So maybe I still am a kid. Just a bit.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

Is it the full moon or Halloween?

Or maybe it's something else that's made the last day so strange.

I should've known after last night's ghost. I had just returned from a fun mini vaca, minding my own business with my friend and the the night's weirdness jolted me into slightly different dimension.

All I wanted to do today was catch up on work, but things just felt off.

When I woke up this morning I was still in that dimension. Lucy (my cat for new visitors), crawled to the very foot of the bed - underneath the covers - and wouldn't come out. I just made her up in the bed.

I jogged and each stride was a struggle. Two check-in conference calls with clients, and neither showed up. Then CITI's fraud department texted and called. Yes, someone tried to use my credit card number online. Now I have to change credit card numbers.

Then a married man, a guy I went out with a long time ago when we were single, texted. He pops up out of nowhere about twice a year, so tonight was the night. Something about tricks, of course.

One good thing happened though. I unfriended my ex on Facebook. And it was tough for some reason. Ridiculous to be dramatic about it, right? But I don't typically unfriend anyone. I'm glad that's over. Now I just have to wait for the reaction.

I know. I'll stop whining. I could have lost my home or worse to Hurricane Sandy.

I hope to wake up in the morning in a new month and  back in my right dimension. Then I have a friend's birthday party tomorrow night and my weekend away to look forward to. These will help lots.

Farewell to Halloween until next year. Hope you made some new memories.
Love to the single girls,
Addison