Arm challenge

It's time for a challenge. It's my challenge to all single girls out there to firm up your arms.

I was at a concert last night. It was a small venue with standing room/general admission only. So that means we were packed in, shoulder to shoulder. I was right in front of the stage because my friend is a huge fan of this artist. She's a big enough fan to she'll out $350 for a VIP ticket so she could talk to him.

It was a good concert and people really got into it. I saw fists pumping and arms raised clapping to the beat. Being so packed in there I couldn't help but notice people's arms when they were raised.

Most of them jiggled.

You know that arm waddle that hangs off? Triceps are hiding under there. Somewhere And it's hot outside so most arms were uncovered. These girls were all ages from late teens to 50s, and most were relatively slender. And they still jiggled - bat wings as I've seen it called. 

This is where my challenge comes in. Work out those arms to get rid of that waddle!

It doesn't take much, I promise. Get some light weights or exercise bands and find some good workout routines online. I just googled triceps exercises and got 5.7 million hits. Here's a series of exercises in Real Simple that only requires an exercise ball and light dumbbells. If you pay those triceps a little attention, I promise they'll love you back with a little more firmness.

I understand genetics come in to a certain degree, but every girl can do it. And there's nothing sexier than a single firm arms.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

A slap of reality

I was perusing the online news headlines to find the story about a syndicated radio deejay who passed away suddenly at way too young of an age. He was someone I grew up with. Someone who kept me company in the car on the commute to work when I used to have to drive to an office.

That news saddened me, but it was one of the other headlines on the page that had a much more profound impact.

"Woman dies after being attacked by her husband."

Tears were in my eyes before I even got to the first paragraph. Sometime in the middle of the night, he assaulted her. The story said the police didn't expect her to die from her injuries. But she did.

It slapped me into reality because it could have been me if I hadn't left my ex. My ex was only physically violent a couple of times, but he had it in him. I never knew what would make him snap.

This woman was a mother of two who have no parents now and a daughter. I'm sure she also had friends and work colleagues and others who cared about her. Did she know she was in danger? Was she afraid to leave? Was death better than staying with him?

No women deserves that end, but it's up to them to seek help before it's too late.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

A visit gone bad

Last night I met a friend at the neighborhood pub. It was my first visit in a while. A friend was playing there and a former neighbor was visiting for the weekend. It was nice to see the old gang.

Another friend, who is almost always alone, joined us. This time he had a lady with him that he introduced as his "friend." She was a tall, very fashionably dressed woman whose mix of Italian and black heritage made her stunning. Someone else walked up to this table and asked who this princess was. As I learned later, she knows him because he's her regular cosmetics customer at Neiman Marcus. Yep, I can believe he's one of the only men I know who has a regular cosmetics consultant - but I'd hardly call him metrosexual.

We chatted while we listened to the music. She was friendly and had never been to the neighborhood before. She was visiting the city from the suburbs. He bought a round of shots, that neither she nor I drank, and people got a little crazier.

As the night progressed, it was pretty obvious they were more than friends - probably feeling each other out to see if they liked each other in a different environment. You know that stage between friend and whatever that doesn't have a name. Then we walked down to the another bar. Her eyes got wider by the minute there. She was out of her element. Totally.

"I've been there done that," she said and pointed around the bar. "Tell me what he's really like."

"That's a conversation you need to have with him," I suggested. "But I have to admit I've never seen him drink this much. He's usually a wine sipper like me."

Her eyes were bugging out and her forehead was wrinkled as she watched the guy I had just been talking to pull his shirt off and show off his muscly body - to the other guys I might add. Guys were being guys and girls were line dancing. People were just letting loose on a Friday night. Drinking too much and having a little fun. They were in their element.

"How do people live like this," she asked me. "Do you? How do you do it?"

"I don't," I answered. "I enjoy having fun. I just got out of a very nasty marriage so I have some catching up to do."

"Me too," she answered.

I almost found myself defending my friends and acquaintances because like me, we all have a story. And maybe some of us aren't quite ready to grow up.

Love to the single girls,
Addison

A different reaction

Today I was talking on the phone with one of my best friends. She asked what I was going to do today. I mentioned I was getting stuff done so I'm be ready for my trip next week.This is for a conference that helps me be a better writer. It's also where I will see my  lover of 3.5 years.

"Oh that's right," she said. "Will you see xxx?" (sorry, can't use his name.) 

"Do I have any choice?" I answered. The words just tumbled out like I was purging bad fish.

She was asking about the man I used to count the days and hours until I'd see him next. I also haven't seen him since his visit in March. Even though we've talked and texted, I feel let down that he didn't follow through with his invitation for me to visit him between then and now. Because of that, there's a little bit of dread in my heart that probably caused the reaction.

We're not dating nor are we committed in any way. But we're friends, and it hurts when someone you care about lets you down.

I'm sure we'll be fine - pick up where we left off just like we always do - unless that dread turns into something the fabulous sex won't make up for. Whether I'm feeling it anymore or not, I'll follow my heart.

Love to the single girls,

Addison

Is it okay to clean naked?

Cleaning naked. Discuss.

Yes, I'm aware this is a bizarre topic, but it inspired me to write. So where did it come from? This week I've been in major get-shit-done mode. I'll be travelling next week and need to catch up some of this chaos in my world before even more piles up while I'm away.

So I finally took a break from working today to take a shower. (Those of us who work from home can do that, you know.) While I stood there about to step into it, I remembered cleaning the bathroom was something I needed to do this weekend. Why not do it now? I said to myself. So I did. And why bother putting clothes back on just for that? My bathroom is very small, so cleaning it isn't a major project. And showering when it's all sparkly is nice. No cute little French maid outfit. Just nothing.

I would have never cleaned naked when I was living with my ex. He was just too assholeish. He would've said or done something crude that would've just pissed me off. He was a slob but never cleaned, so that was definitely not a sexy topic in my mind with him. I might entertain the idea with someone else though. What would be even more fun is cleaning naked together.

Love to the single girls,
Addison